So I was thinking about compiling a list of the Top Ten Things to Do in Heaven. Please help me develop this list. For those that do, you shall receive a crown of life. Others shall be cast into the outer darkness, where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth.
10. Make some cool jewelry from pieces of pavement.
9. Ask Noah why the hell he didn’t swat both mosquitoes when he had the chance.
First thing I’m going to do is take a dip in the milkshake pool, and then visit the Lesbian Cloud. Perhaps I can convince them to clean the milkshake off of me… I just hope the rumors about flapjacks being evil and not allowed in heaven aren’t true.
Nope. It’s all been worked out that if you qualify for one heaven you can’t qualify for any of the others. It’s more or less a straight choice between a harp or 72 virgins. It either plucking or f… something that rhymes with plucking, anyway.