So one of the first things I’ll do when I arrive in Hell is add some more hot sauce to my lunch, feel the burn baby! Then after a good meal strip down to my swim trunks, for fun in the heat. I’ll find the party and join Madonna, Mae West, the Marx Brothers, Gypsy Rose Lee, Heidi Fleiss, John Lennon, Robin Byrd, Andy Warhol, Bikini Kill, Bad Religion, Screeching Weasel, Sonic Youth, and enjoy myself. As I perform one sin after another, that is Satan’s plan to distance us from God, I eventually just forget about God completely, ah now that’s relieving.
I can debate and study with Galileo Galilei, Nicolaus Copernicus, Archimedes, Eratosthenes, Hpatia, Johannes Kepler, Benedict De Spinoza, Corliss Lamont, Amy Mainzer, Lisa Randall. 
What about Heaven, I don’t really like milk and honey that much, and if you people want to spend time with Jerry Fallwell, Joan of Arc, Mother Theresa, David Koresh, Scott Roeder (murderer of Dr. George Tiller), Osama Bin Laden, and Pat Roberts, then be my guest. Party with seventy-two virgins who haven’t discovered the big-O yet?
I’ll be honest, I’ll admit that Sir Issac Newton, Francis Crick, Betty Page could be fascinating people.
Jump in the pit, I say.
I’ve been to Hell and back, its in Michigan, near Pinckney.
If the harpist wants gigs then look for the Irish festivals, the Irish appreciate the harp.