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Heard any good jokes lately?
Posted: 27 August 2013 02:26 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 166 ]
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What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?

 

 

 

 


The Holocaust

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Posted: 27 August 2013 06:11 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 167 ]
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There seems to be a fair amount of text missing between the first line and the second one at the bottom of the post.  Could you add that?

Occam

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Posted: 27 August 2013 07:05 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 168 ]
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Occam. - 27 August 2013 06:11 PM

There seems to be a fair amount of text missing between the first line and the second one at the bottom of the post.  Could you add that?

Occam

Maybe that’s where the humor was supposed to go

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Posted: 27 August 2013 08:27 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 169 ]
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CuthbertJ - 27 August 2013 02:26 PM

What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?

 

 

 

 


The Holocaust

LOL

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Posted: 28 August 2013 09:41 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 170 ]
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Occam. - 27 August 2013 06:11 PM

There seems to be a fair amount of text missing between the first line and the second one at the bottom of the post.  Could you add that?

Occam

I guess it doesn’t come off as good online.  The blank lines are so that you don’t instantly read the answer with the question all at once, which most readers do (i.e. can’t help reading ahead a little).  And in case DarronS really didn’t get the humor, when you read/hear the cutesy question you’re expecting some kind of cutesy answer, like “a snake in your orange”.  Then you hear about the most unfunny uncutesy thing imaginable, which IS in fact worse, and you laugh (at least everyone I’ve ever told it to almost wet their pants).

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Posted: 28 August 2013 05:14 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 171 ]
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jokes about German sausage are wurst.

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Posted: 28 August 2013 05:17 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 172 ]
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I’m guessing that Cuthbert’s native language isn’t English and that the humor in his country is significantly different from that of the U.S.

Occam

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Posted: 28 August 2013 07:57 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 173 ]
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CuthbertJ - 27 August 2013 02:26 PM

What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.

Take care,

Derek

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Posted: 28 August 2013 07:58 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 174 ]
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harry canyon - 28 August 2013 07:57 PM
CuthbertJ - 27 August 2013 02:26 PM

What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.

Take care,

Derek

Now that’s funny!

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Posted: 29 August 2013 10:02 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 175 ]
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Occam. - 28 August 2013 05:17 PM

I’m guessing that Cuthbert’s native language isn’t English and that the humor in his country is significantly different from that of the U.S.

Occam

Wrong. I’m guessing you’re more of a Henny Youngman fan.

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Posted: 29 August 2013 10:07 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 176 ]
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“I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up-they have no Holidays”

Henny Youngman

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One good schoolmaster is of more use than a hundred priests.

Thomas Paine

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Posted: 29 August 2013 10:30 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 177 ]
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CuthbertJ - 28 August 2013 09:41 AM
Occam. - 27 August 2013 06:11 PM

There seems to be a fair amount of text missing between the first line and the second one at the bottom of the post.  Could you add that?

Occam

I guess it doesn’t come off as good online.  The blank lines are so that you don’t instantly read the answer with the question all at once, which most readers do (i.e. can’t help reading ahead a little).  And in case DarronS really didn’t get the humor, when you read/hear the cutesy question you’re expecting some kind of cutesy answer, like “a snake in your orange”.  Then you hear about the most unfunny uncutesy thing imaginable, which IS in fact worse, and you laugh (at least everyone I’ve ever told it to almost wet their pants).

I didn’t get this either. I’m not sure even how this it could be funny under what you said but recognize that it depends on where one comes from. I never even found the “chicken-crossing-the-road” joke funny at any time either contrary to what I assume was many others did in their youth.

Here’s an old one my uncle told me:

A string walks into a bar and asks for a drink.
The bartender says, “sorry, we don’t serve strings here.”
So the string tries another bar.
Again, he receives a similar response.
After many failed attempts, he decides that the prejudice is just to much and so figured that if he could just create a disguise,
he could be able to be accepted and get his drink. So he ties himself into a not and frays his ends and then tries again.
As he sat down in the next bar in disguise, the bartender tries to find clarity and says,
  “I bet that you are a string and you are trying to convince me that I should give you a beer?”
His response?
  “Frayed Knot!”

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Posted: 29 August 2013 11:41 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 178 ]
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Thevillageatheist - 29 August 2013 10:07 AM

“I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up-they have no Holidays”

Henny Youngman

That is actually a problem.  As a Catholic friend once told me.  “Never give up a reason for a party.”

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Gary the Human

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Posted: 29 August 2013 02:24 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 179 ]
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Scott Mayers - 29 August 2013 10:30 AM
CuthbertJ - 28 August 2013 09:41 AM
Occam. - 27 August 2013 06:11 PM

There seems to be a fair amount of text missing between the first line and the second one at the bottom of the post.  Could you add that?

Occam

I guess it doesn’t come off as good online.  The blank lines are so that you don’t instantly read the answer with the question all at once, which most readers do (i.e. can’t help reading ahead a little).  And in case DarronS really didn’t get the humor, when you read/hear the cutesy question you’re expecting some kind of cutesy answer, like “a snake in your orange”.  Then you hear about the most unfunny uncutesy thing imaginable, which IS in fact worse, and you laugh (at least everyone I’ve ever told it to almost wet their pants).

I didn’t get this either. I’m not sure even how this it could be funny under what you said but recognize that it depends on where one comes from. I never even found the “chicken-crossing-the-road” joke funny at any time either contrary to what I assume was many others did in their youth.

Here’s an old one my uncle told me:

A string walks into a bar and asks for a drink.
The bartender says, “sorry, we don’t serve strings here.”
So the string tries another bar.
Again, he receives a similar response.
After many failed attempts, he decides that the prejudice is just to much and so figured that if he could just create a disguise,
he could be able to be accepted and get his drink. So he ties himself into a not and frays his ends and then tries again.
As he sat down in the next bar in disguise, the bartender tries to find clarity and says,
  “I bet that you are a string and you are trying to convince me that I should give you a beer?”
His response?
  “Frayed Knot!”

Interesting…you have all these posts on CFI that purport to be the next big thing in theoretical physics, and yet you find simplistic play-on-words jokes funny.  Not saying that’s bad or good, just interesting.

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Posted: 29 August 2013 02:49 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 180 ]
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It was a joke I was told when I was something like 14. But I think most jokes are usually either direct or indirect plays on words in some way. I like any kind of humor. Ever watch Just For Laughs: Gags? As a production made in Quebec, they wanted to create a gag show that didn’t require having to speak French in order to appeal to a larger Canadian audience. And now, I think (but am not sure), that an American investment brought the show to there as well using the same format. So I guess this would be using a play on perceptual expectations and illusion.

Edit: their to there.

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