I am going to explain what my good moods are like to me. I know I’ve talked about this time and time again. But all my previous topics were way too long and I wish to give an effective brief summary here so people get a clear message.
First off, I am a hedonist as I’ve said before. That means you think that pleasure (your good moods) are all there is to life and are all there is to having meaning, joy, and happiness in your life. It is a life in which you solely live by the pain/pleasure principle. That is, to pursue pleasure and avoid pain. Any moral values you have only give your life meaning in the context of the pain/pleasure principle. That is, your life can only have meaning, joy, and happiness if you are in a good mood and don’t have any suffering in your life at the moment.
Now the words “hedonism” and “pleasure” imply something less important. It implies that you are living your life for nothing more than some pleasant sensation such as from hot chocolate or being rubbed on the back. This is a misconception of my own hedonistic life. My good moods are very profound and life depending experiences for me in my life. So it is for this very reason that I would no longer refer to myself as being a hedonist and is why I would no longer refer to my good moods as being “pleasure.”
My moods are not nothing more than pleasant or unpleasant sensations. They alter my entire perception of reality. They are life altering mental states. Many people claim that they are nothing more than sensations and that one can have meaning, joy, and happiness in his/her life even while feeling down, blue, and depressed. But I have never understood this. It never made any sense to me.
When I am depressed, it is not just some unpleasant feeling (sensation) I am getting and nothing more. When I am depressed, the entire universe around me lowers down into a state of hell. My life then has the worst meaning. If I live a depressed life, then my entire reality has changed for the worst regardless of what great things I do in my life anyway.
But when I am not depressed and have my good moods, then my life is transcended into a state of paradise. It is the most profound and beautiful life for me. But having neither my good or bad moods is neither heaven nor hell for me. It is like being in limbo. So my good moods are absolutely vital and life depending for me. Without them, then it is like I am being suffocated. My good moods are like the air I need to breathe. I need air in order to live physically. But I need my good moods in order to live in terms of having good meaning, love, joy, happiness, and inspiration in my life.
It’s as if my good and bad moods are not moods at all and shouldn’t even be referred to as being “moods.” It’s as if they are some sort of supernatural sixth sense of my brain that transcend all other mental functions including thought. When I am in a good mood, it is like I am having the most profound and greatest transcended experience ever. It is like I am sensing heaven itself. It is like I am living in heaven.
But without my good moods, then I can tell myself all I want that my life still has good meaning, love, joy, inspiration, and happiness and I can do all I want with my life, but it is like I am in limbo in which all those things I am telling myself are nothing more than words and phrases and not any true good meaning, joy, happiness, etc. So my good moods are like some transcended mental experience bestowed upon me by angels of heaven. They are what transcend me, my life, and my composing dream into something truly great. They are what inspire my compositions and are the only things that do so.
Now I am a materialist and I do not believe in anything supernatural. So I am just giving a metaphorical description here for what my good moods are like to me. I am also not saying that I am better and unique than everyone else and that my brain is gifted and better than anyone else’s. I am just simply explaining what my moods are like to me. My good and bad moods are like portals to heaven and hell. That is how powerful and profound they are to me. No other mental state compares to them. Not even my way of thinking alone.
When I am in a good mood, I have entered heaven. My life is full of bliss, joy, happiness, inspiration, and good meaning. My good moods are a sacred divine transcending life force far beyond any of my other mental functions. This is what my experience of my good moods are like to me. Even the version of joy and happiness that Buddhists speak of which is a content mindstate, this is nothing in comparison. The content mindstate is a state of thought and that’s all it is. If you have depression in your life, then the Buddhists would tell you to accept and be content with your life anyway.
But these Buddhists are dead wrong here. They say that this content mindstate is true happiness, joy, and good meaning in one’s life when it is quite the contrary. My good moods transcend any state of thought I can ever achieve in my life. Like I said before, no other mental state compares to them. So my good moods are the only source of true happiness, joy, good meaning, and inspiration for me in my life. Without them, then my life is empty and meaningless. Especially if I am depressed. When I am depressed, I have entered the portal to hell and no content mindstate can ever possibly give my life any good meaning, joy, happiness, etc. while I am depressed. It is no different than being content in cold, empty, meaningless space. Your life is still meaningless regardless of how content you are.
I said before that my good and bad moods are like a supernatural sixth sense of my brain. It is like how psychics enter whole new supernatural realms. As long as they are in the realm of a bleak world that is fully of emptiness and despair, then them being content in such a realm is very likely to not bring their lives any meaning, joy, or happiness. Let me tell you that. So that is what depression is like for me. When I am depressed, it is like I have entered a whole new realm in which no way of thinking can ever possibly bring my life any good meaning, love, joy, happiness, etc.
Same concept also applies to my good moods. As long as I am in a good mood, then no way of thinking can make my life empty and meaningless. I am currently in a state of paradise of no suffering at the moment when I have my good moods. It’s like I am in heaven. When you are in heaven, there is no more meaninglessness and it doesn’t matter what you think to yourself, your life cannot be meaningless. So my good and bad moods are not just simply moods. They are not just simply pleasant or unpleasant sensations. They are forces of heaven and hell.
Therefore, I would not call myself a hedonist, I would not call my good moods “pleasure,” and I would even go so far as no longer referring to them as “good moods” anymore either. I would instead call myself a “supernaturalist” in which I live for a supernatural force of heaven in my life and rely on it to give my life meaning. My good moods are like the transcending life force of a deity. They are the life force of a transcended angel. So I would instead refer to my good moods as being “spiritual transcending life force” and I would instead refer to my depression as being “soul-destroying life force.”